Google Translate
ArabicKorean Japanese Chinese Simplified Russian Portuguese
English French German Spain Italian Dutch


YOU'RE on RelationshipFixed.com: Leading Relationship Blog with Original Contents for Singles and Married.

Please Read, Comment & Share with Your Friends
| For Relationship Tips or Advice, Be FREE to Book a Session.

***

e-Mails - After Aborting 3 Times For Him, He's Set To Marry Another Lady This Month.


I got this in my inbox few days ago and i think i should share it with my blog readers. Please, insulting her isn't the way-out, hence, let your advice be a solution to this terrific life experience. Thank you readers!

********************** The INBOX *********************
I'm sorry to bother you but this will be long. This is the past 5 years of my life i'm trying so hard not to remember. I'm not new to life experiences, i've heard and seen a lot of relationship troubles. I've counselled many ladies like me but why i fell for this still remains a misery. Please don't blame me, i'm in pain already. I've asked myself so many questions i still can't answer, i've tried to forgive and move on but i couldn't. If for just once, i've decided to listen to my dark side. Pls, don't bother how suspicious this account may look, it's the same account i used in finding out the whole truth from the unlucky lady. I met this guy august 2008 at the wedding of my boss and after about 6 months of trying to be difficult, i decided to date him. Before then, I've had my share of men's headache and loving him at first wasn't so easy for me that i'd to ignore him for that long. heaven knows how much i loved him. It was all over him that he loved me too, we just couldn't hide it. We both enjoy the moments and i gave my all to keep us together. I lost my decisions to him, i tried not to wrong him, he was my total desire for a man, and how would i want to lose him? Our first year took a lot out of me. I could remember how badly i missed him when his company sent him to Kenya. He came back and it was like he never left. That was the night i lost my virginity to him. He knew i wasn't ready for it and he also supported my decision but somehow, we couldn't control our affection though i'm not regreting in any way. I was only overpowered by my emotions, naive and inexperience. Even in the pain, i felt good because it was him i never knew one could get pregnant so fast or maybe my timing was wrong. Few weeks later, the signs were obvious to me. I told him but to my surprise, his mood changed, he couldn't continue with his meal before he started making me see reasons why keeping the baby would affect our plans. One of the reasons was how irresponsible his father would think he is and could stop his plan of going to the U.K for his masters. I couldn't say no since i've always wanted the best for him. He gave me 20k which i refused. In one of the sad moment of my life, i called a friend and told her, she contacted someone to help us and finally we got a doctor somewhere in (location withheld) to do the abortion. I did it but for a week, i couldn't go to work. I wasn't alright until after a month. I almost lost my job, i couldn't explain what went wrong but the good part is that i was fine again. We were doing well all along despite the distance. In 2010 he came back shortly from the U.K and since i was holding on for that long, i've missed him so much. That night saying no to him was not in my head and we had it and many times. It was the best ever and we were cool. He was about going back when i discovered i wasn't myself. I had to call my doctor, made an appointed and i got to know i was pregnant again. It was a mixed feeling but i called him up immediately and told him. He sounded ok before letting me know that we're not ready for it. Truly, i wasn't ready due to official reasons at work. I thought about it and had to flush it. After his masters, he came to nigeria, introduced me to his parents and we got along so well. Though he said he wasn't going to work for his former company, he went on to set up his. Everything was cool until i started noticing certain changes in him. He wouldn't pick me from the office as usual, he was more busy that we hadly have time to talk. I thought i was asking too much so i didn't complain. I was with him on a weekend when his phone rang, he was in the bathroom then. I picked the phone to give him since i don't pick his calls. The caller id was kinda strange, like a combination of some letters. He spoke with the person, my instinct told me it was a lady and when he gave me the phone back, i searched his phone for any sms from that number. I was able to get an email which i put through facebook and that confirmed my doubts. The bastard was engaged to another lady. He was smart not have accepted so as not to be visible on his profile. I was lost, i wanted to die right there. I quickly opened another account and i made friend with the lady. We were so close and we talked more, within 3weeks we were like best of friends. I asked about my man and she opened up so much that my body became weak. I got to know they would be getting married from her. I never asked for a life like this. Why are men so evil? To make it worse, i was pregnant for him again. I couldn't hold it, i confronted him, my chris was right before me looking like an idiot. I only wish i had a gun, it would have ended right there. I knew there wasn't hope of a father for the baby, i never wanted to be single mom so i ran to his parents but his mother’s reception was so cold that i suspected something was wrong. I went back home. I cried my eyes out, nothing could be more painful in the world than my feelings. I told myself i was going to face it, i left my parents out of this mess. I badge into his house the next morning around 7am, told him i was carrying his child and that i was going to abort it. He was just looking at me and later starting apologizing. I was so mad that i had to throw his home stool at him, he was so quick to dodge it. I wish i had killed him. I went back to his mother and she shouted at me, she said her son will never marry me. My head flew off but i never talked back, i was calm to ask her reason. I got to realise that he had told his mother about the abortions and how it was only me that took the decision. In my life i have never been this terrible knowing how well he convinced his mom to hating me. Now i have aborted the thing, it doesn't make any sense keeping it. I'm only asking you for advice if there is a better way to end this because i already have his wedding date later this month and sincerely i had contracted his death. Please keep this to yourself as i'm only seeking a better ending but not pleading for his death. I know i look so wasted and useless right now but he’s never going to enjoy any moment of his life, that i promise.

************************* ENDS ************************

There's no way i would have kept this barbaric life experience and at the same time allow someone's death. I saw urgency in her story; i saw a lady who could take any decision regardless of the damage. I've spoken with her on phone and she seem alright. I made her realize how there's no better ending that she seeks in the death of the young man. What i don't know is if she has truly changed her mind. I still don't have any details but this might be a warning to someone out there that's why i couldn't hide the name. I usually don't do this! It's without permission, at least, not when a life is at stake. Please advice her and that could save a life! I will make sure i refer her to this post to read your comments.

Opinions
4 Opinions

4 comments:

James said...

My dear, i indeed sympathized with you as i went through your story! I want you to know that that guy left your becouse he was not meant for eventhough he left you in a very terrible circumstance. Sometimes in life, we get what we did not bergain for. Now if you succeed in taking his life, will it restore the damages that he caused you? But God can restore everything you have lost. No time is too late for God. If you can have the courage to allow God take control of this situation, you will never regret you did. Please, forgive him and allow God to handle the situation. The important thing is that you are still alive.
Please call me 08069331838 for a more advice and prayers. 08069331838

Dele said...

Well, I will like you, my dear sister in humanity, to pick yourself up after this pathetic episode of your life. The experience is excruciating, right. In fact, experience teaches in a hard way. Anyway, yours isn't the first and won't be the last. And, evidently, though troubling, it isn't the worst. Some have experienced cases more irredeemable! In spite of that, let him be, please. Just leave him alone. I believe what goes round comes round. I advise you to keep him with everything relating to him out of sight as the saying "out of sight is out of mind" goes. Fight yourself to keep it out of mind.
Besides, dedicate your virtue of SINCERITY and FAITHFULNESS which you invested heavily on him while cheating on you to your Creator. Ask for His (God) forgiveness and turn a new leaf. Stop brooding and speaking about it anymore. Instead, keep company of good friends who remind you of great purpose in life and hereafter.
Believe your Creator has an assignment for you for which you had to undergo a training. You have been trained not to live under the control of emotion. Ok?
Human beings do disappoint, but God doesn't. Sit up. Open up your heart. Sing new song. Live and let live! The sense you made out of the incidence clearly depends on you. Please, make good sense out of it. Don't be negative. Be positive my dear sister and see good things life has in stock for you.
I pray God to lift you up, make you great, love you and make you the loving wife of a loving husband with lasting and lovely relationship.
Accept the assurance of my best wishes.

Joy said...

Hello There,
My advise for the young lady is to forget about the guy and forge ahead.I know its not easy to forget about somebody you love dearly.He is not her man,God will bring her man.She should just seek for God's forgiveness and trust him.She should not think of harming the guy or disrupting the wedding because that will do more harm than good to her.She should leave vengence for God.A time is coming when she will remember all that has happened and she will thank God for everything.
Best of luck.
Joy I.

Anonymous said...

Hi dear, it is true I dont know u but my advise to u is that u shouldn't do anything like ur thought has it cos u may just realise u are in even in a worst condition.
Just let it go, drop at the feet of the MASTER JESUS CHRIST the great judge . He will judge your man. Let it go, move ahead with ur life though not easy but God will make it light for u. He said come lets reason together , even though ur sins are as scarlet, HE will make them white as the snow. That's all u need. Its not worth taking anybody's life. Leave it for God.
Regards