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New Ranking: The 10 U.S States with High Divorce Rate in 2016





The 10 U.S States with a High Divorce Rate in 2016


Are you single? Take note! Are you married? Take note also! Apart from the personality called "irreconcilable differences" that has been crowned and cited as the reason for millions of divorce over the years, do you know that the environment or state you live in can also break up a marriage?

The United States of America was said to have had 50% divorce rate in 2013/2014 (American Psychological Association) which has seen itself increased by 7.5% with some new state joining the list and few old states either dropping off or increasing its rank. By PEW Research Centre statistics in 2009, most divorce cases was sponsored by people that got married at the age of 24 or younger. Which means it was probably too early or they had inadequate knowledge of what they were getting into.

Things have gone worse. 2017 could be on the high or low side but at the moment, the fast rate at which most marital status changes from married to separated is the same rate it's changing from separated to divorce. Which means that very few separated couple come back together to make the marriage work.

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Now lets get to see the list of states with high divorce rate in the U.S 


10) Maine, Portland in Specific














9) New Mexico, Albuquerque in Specific












8) Tennessee, Memphis and Nashville in Specific














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7) Kentucky, Louisville in Specific













6) Idaho, Boise and Meridian in Specific















5) Arkansas, Little Rock in Specific.















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4) West Virginia, Charleston in Specific










3) Oklahoma, Oklahoma City and Broken Arrow in Specific













2) Oregon, Portland in Specific


















1) Nevada, Las Vegas in Specific
Fact is, Nevada has a unique history with divorce. In 1930s, the city of Reno made it extremely easy to get a divorce, making the Biggest Little City in the World a divorce hot spot for everyone from movie stars to housewives.












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MUST READ: 7 Easy Ways To Catch A Cheating Husband and Boyfriend



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7 Easy Ways To Catch A Cheating Husband or Boyfriend


The Raw Tips for Women Only

How To Catch a Cheating Husband or Boyfriend


In my last article on what to do when your husband is having an affair, i made some clear cut points that triggered some feedback and that powered this topic. I noticed that most women are not always sure when their husband is cheating since he has smartly covered his tracks and balanced the home front. Some women are really careful of accusing their spouse of cheating because they really don't know if they are right or wrong and also the danger in accusing your husband of cheating when he is not can be disturbing, hence, they remain in doubts even when something on the inside says he is cheating. Yeah, it can be that complex. You just can't rely on inner talks or feelings about your cheating husband and you can't act or accuse him base on assumptions too. Whichever, you need to catch him cheating on you to confirm your doubts but how would you do that?

Warning: Some action points could be more aggressive than others, it's advisable you use each point according to the degree of your marital trouble.

How To Catch a Cheating Husband, any of these would work.

Action Point No. 1 - Pretend All is Alright - Don't be reactive! Most women do chose to go hyper. No! Be smart and pay attention to details surrounding him. Know that you can't keep watching him all day as that alone is enough stress. There are some thing he would start doing. Don't question his sudden decisions to come home late or travel or hang around friends. Don’t worry about the calls he’s not picking in your presence or refuses to pick. Don’t worry about his change of wardrobe or interest in a new clothing collections. Allow a bird to fly! And while he keeps thinking you're so dumb and even not aware of his cheating moves, he will be creating more space to fall in your net. The more you act like you don't know, the more he would think he has got the space to cheat and in so little time, it will be very open.



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Action Point No. 2 - Confide in Someone - Nowadays, i see women hiring detective to give a close watch on their husbands. I think it's not right and more damaging. I would advise you find someone you have known all along or have a good relationship with overtime to help you on this. The person could be his colleague at the office, your sister or brother, family friend, anyone but not a stranger. And don't go about telling every member of your family as that could mean opening up your relationship in a shameful way. Remember, the essence of catching him is not to destroy your relationship so you have to apply max caution and wisdom. If he was seen in an hotel with another woman; his mistress maybe, you can prove your case and still keep your home if it was your sister or relative that saw that more than a detective. No matter the level of damage of your relationship, hiring a spy is more damaging. It destroys it without hope, ask Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt.

Action Point No. 3 - Set Him up - This actually is the easiest. I was chatting with a client last week and she told me her husband was hitting on her sister and she had left the house since she doesn't want to break her sister's marriage. That really must be an extreme measure for any man to satisfy his high libido but it happens everywhere. So i told her, call your sister back in the house, ask her to accept the proposal from her cheating husband. She thought i was crazy. Really it may sound crazy but that's a better close catch. Her sister would act like it's normal to date her sister's husband and that she's not aware of what's going on. She would agree to go on a date with him then in one of the dates, the idea of meeting in a private place would definitely come up and that's all. He just got caught! 

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Another way, that lady may not be your sister but just some raunchy girl out there. Make the terms really clear from the start as she could be hurt if she goes beyond your instructions. Let their path cross, a little stepping on his toes or hitting on him in a club or his regular spot could start a conversation. A selfie of their first kiss could be enough evidence of cheating on you. 

NOTE: Don't do this if you're NOTE SURE your husband is cheating on you. But if he's a serial cheat and you want to nail him once and for all, go ahead.


Action Point No. 4 - Install a Call Recorder on His Phone - Some men have this application already installed on their phone, you just can simply go ahead and listen to the recordings. But if it's not installed, be careful of those apps that ask for permission before recording. Don't leave this on his phone for too long. It could be installed before a weekend he won't be spending with you, or before a meeting that you suspect. I know there are so many mobile spy software out there, i would advise you stay clear if you don't know the use. This is a little tech and if you're not tech-oriented, just leave out this option.  

Ways to Catch a Cheating Spouse


Action Point No. 5 - Micro Keylogger: I was told this software helps in storing or hacking passwords. Well, just in case he changes his login details and doesn't want to share it with you anymore, get an expert to install this carefully on his laptop and you sure can read his messages. Trust me, in a sane marriage, there should be no secrets. No password hiding!

Action Point No. 6 - Leave for a vacation (the truth is, you’re not on vacation, you're somewhere close). Cheating husbands usually do the unusual acts when the wife is away. So before leaving, make sure you plant a recording device somewhere strategic in the house, like the bedroom and living room. By common sense, a cheating husband would take his mistress out for dinner because they are careful of rumors from the neighborhood while some would bring her home since you're supposedly on vacation. Whichever, a surprise visit could get him busted.


Action Point No. 7 - Create a Fake Social Profile: Now this is interesting! I once counseled a client to do this and it worked perfectly. In fact it corrected the marriage and gave it a fresh start with new goals. Here's how she did it:

* She identified the social platform her husband was so addicted to
* She created a fake profile with a random sexy picture of a lady and made friend with him
* Time after time her husband unknowingly was chatting with his own wife on the internet without giving her attention at home. 
* They were so connected and were like lovebirds on the internet not knowing it was his wife.
* As men would be men, he asked for nude pictures which she sent to him without showing her face, just those parts. Of course the high hormone won't make even a sane man differentiate that part. 
* All the while, the attention she was lacking at home, she was getting it on the internet from her husband.
* Time to meet was so embarrassing but emotional as they agreed to meet in an hotel.
* Her husband already booked a room and was waiting for this new catch and here comes in...his very own wife.

It is embarrassing to discuss what happened afterward but that was the marriage correction.

Initially, the man's excuse for cheating was that she was irritating. So this lady adjusted everything possible and impossible to satisfy him yet it never worked out. She told me she kept asking him; "what else do you want from me...so i was not irritating you all the while if you can show me so much love and give me so much attention on the internet." It was quite an emotional moment but i'm glad it worked.

In Conclusion: I once did a survey, gathered from clients and open sources. I realized that 69% of men have once engaged in physical cheating. Though everyone cheats, either by admiring a man's body because he looks like Dwayne Johnson or his sexy blue eyes like Paul walker (RIP man) or taking a second look at her booty like Kim Kardashian or boobs like Micki Minaj, everyone is a cheat. But physical cheating is different, that's going extra steps to make it real. In this context, since not every man engages in physical cheating, don't always suspect the late coming or staying out late of your husband as one. But whenever you found out that he's really cheating on you, use any of these 7 action points to find him out. Don't forget, use any of these according to the level of aggression your marriage is facing. 

Declaimer: Coachdexplorer.com is not responsible for any damage or situation resulting from the application of any of these above action points. 

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How To Cope With Divorce The Positive Way


Here is How To Cope With Divorce The Positive Way


A break-up from a relationship can hurt and break your heart into pieces. Many people have a hard time coping up with a simple break up but what if you are breaking up not only with your boyfriend/girlfriend? 

What if you already have that piece of paper signed, that ring on your finger and that promised to be with each other through thick and thin?

Can you still cope up with the heartache when you are ending a relationship that is already bound in marriage?


How To Survive A Divorce?

Divorce is common. However, no matter how common it is, a couple undergoing a divorce process is still under mental and emotional stress especially if you have invested a lot of feelings in your relationship. It may be hard how to survive divorce yet it is still doable.
Most people may feel bad about the divorce procedures but knowing how to survive a divorce will help you deal with it well. Proper handling of a divorce may even make you improve yourself into a stronger and happier person because you will be able to learn from the mistakes of your failed relationship when you are in search for a new one.

It is okay to grieve. Know that grieving is important. When you lose something or someone, grieving is just a normal process and it is important that you allow yourself a proper grieving period to ensure that you will be able to move on.

Be open about what you are feeling. Most often, you try to hide your tears and pain because it is either you are too embarrass to let other people see you or you are too angry with yourself or your partner for a failed relationship. But you should take note that it is important to have those feelings and more important to be open and share whatever it is that is inside of you. You do not want to explode because of those unexpressed emotions, do you?

Have a great support network. Even if you feel alone because you no longer have a partner to share the challenge with, always remember that you are not alone. You still have your family and friends who are willing to help and be there for you. You may feel awkward with their company but they will be a big help for you to handle the situation fine.

Give attention to yourself. When in a relationship, it is possible that you have limited time to spend with yourself because you always give time to your partner. This is the high time now for you to enjoy something for yourself. Reflect about yourself. Are you still happy? Are you improving? Are you still willing to be in a new relationship?

Take care of yourself physically, emotionally and mentally. Divorce can cause you too much stress that it might hamper your health. When you want to cope up with a divorce, it is best if you are fit to handle the situation when you are in a healthy state of mind, controlled emotions and physically capable.

Be positive always. Negativity never helps. Once you have a positive outlook towards the situation and in your life, you will be able to know that everything will still be okay and go back to normal after all the pains and hurts. Having a positive mind will make you realize and feel that there is more to life than this challenge and it will push you to move on towards the future.

Know that you still have a future to live for. A failed relationship in the past doesn’t mean that you will also have a failed relationship in the future. Though you may think that you can’t handle a relationship well because you already failed once, you just have to learn from the mistakes of the past to make your future better. Stand up from that failure and I know that you will be better in the process.
Surviving a divorce is not only inclusive between you and your partner. It also involves the children if your marriage resulted to any. You should put into consideration the feelings of your children because parents divorcing may impact them and their future mentality about marriage as well. Hence, it is very important to explain everything to your kids to ensure that they understand the situation and their relationships in the future will not be affected.

To help your children cope up with the situation, it is best that you and your ex-partner will be there for them and talk it through with them.

Do not bad-mouth your ex-partner in front of the children. Bad-mouthing will decrease their respect towards both parents. They may develop hostility towards the other party while they can develop aloofness towards you. Always remember that whatever the conflict between spouses, the children is out of it.

Listen to your kids’ feelings and be there for them. Your kids have feelings of their own too and they need both parents to help them handle the negativities of the situation. Ensure them that despite the separation both of you are still there for them and that nothing will еvеr сhаngе thе fact thаt уоu аrе ѕtіll thеіr раrеntѕ. Sоmеtіmеѕ, kids may think that they are the reason of the divorce and they feel bad about it. Tell them that they are not in any way involved in the decision and that it is not their fault. 

Explain the pros and cons of the situation and make them understand that separation is better than still being together.


Continue children’s daily activities. You want your children to live their lives as normal as possible so doing daily routines that they are familiar with can really help a lot. Since they are also experiencing stress and emotional instability, doing things that they find normal such as going to school and bonding over good friends will help them deal with the whole process. To receive another interesting article directly in your inbox click here. 



Happy Relationship Life!

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How Do I Move On After Being Cheated On?




Being cheated on by your boyfriend/girlfriend or husband.wife is a lot of pain already. Knowing that this is someone you once trusted and loved and perhaps, you've laid everything down just for the relationship. Yet, how to move on or get healed after being cheated on is more important and it's obvious things aren't the same anymore. So here, i will share some ways to recover after this ugly experience.


1. CRY, CRY, CRY - Be aware that if truly trust is broken, you can't afford not to cry. If you hold your tears from rolling down your cheek, it will tear you on the inside. The first way of getting yourself back together is the healing-tears therapy, yeah, it really works. It's a way of painful expression that shouldn't be held back. Now, don't cry too much, if you do, you get sick and lean. Is it worth losing some pounds?



2. ASK FOR A PERSONAL SPACE - Let him know you want some time alone. If you are married, i had advise you stay living with him; what will be affected is the couple's talks or communication that used to be good, his meals, sex and others should not be affected. You're surely killing him on the inside and would keep begging for forgiveness. It's important he knows you're hurt. Fact is, your joy is not in his plea for forgiveness, in fact you've no joy in this at all. All you've got is a space to think properly about your relationship with him and what he would have to do to have you back in total.

3. SEEK COUNSELLING - What counseling does is to open the minds of you both to feasible options. I do recommend counseling for troubled couples not trouble girlfriends and boyfriends. Actually, if you're not married to him and he's giving you headaches and heartaches already, just kick his ass already!

4 FORGIVE - Hey beautiful, truth is, almost every man has cheated before. I'm not talking sexual intimacy alone. It could text message or social media flirting, phone sex or picture arousal. The average man has once cheated. So, if you think there is a guy that's super-perfect out there for you, i will say - go ahead. But if not, just forgive. I once had a client that told me that as long as he comes home every night, she doesn't have a problem with him. Really her husband was a chronic cheats. Now that's some woman right there! If you really want to be healed, forgive him! 


5 MOVE ON - Moving on doesn't mean you seek a divorce, it actually meant leaving the dirty scene behind. I see a lot of people get drunk, go to clubs and sorts just to get healed. Wherein such relieve is temporary. The reality is that there's a pain in the heart and such takes certain process to get over with and not some days of been a bad girl or looking horrible. Fact is a wound will always leave a scar that clears off with time, hence, moving on is assuming it never happened. It could be hard but no matter how hard it looks, you've to get healed first. Know that the dude may or may not be damaging himself as much as you do. Move on and get healed! To receive another interesting article directly to your inbox click here. 



Happy Relationship Life!

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3 Easy Ways On How To Deal With A Breakup


how to deal with a breakup
I never heard anyone said that break-ups are easy. Every time I hear my friends talk about their break-ups, I always expect wailing, crying, drinking and a lot of sniffs. Yeah, sure, break-up hurts… too much. For people who have not been in love, they might think that it is very easy to move on but here’s the difference: you are in love, they are not. Basically, you are on your own to battle that pain, collect the battered, broken pieces of your heart, form it again into a whole new heart and move on. I make it sound so easy, right? But it is actually not.

How To Deal With A Breakup?
Let’s be honest here, there is no easy way to move on. It requires a tedious process and perhaps a long one too. There’s no easy ways to survive a break up. There's a saying that goes like this, “It took me a day to fall in love, but it will take me long time to say goodbye.” Here’s the deal, it may be a long time to move on but nobody said that it is impossible. Moving on is actually impossible and what you need are these three simple steps that I will discuss in detail.

1. Let it all out Cry.
Shout. Break things. You are hurt and you need to let it out. Some people might say that you should act tough and don’t give your ex the satisfaction to see that you are affected by the break-up. This may be true, but in doing so, you are suppressing your emotions and you are not healing the right way. In order for you to really move on, you must heal and in order for you to heal, you must let all the negative energy and bad vibes away.

You want to feel hurt because you are hurt. No one should take that feeling away from you. You deserve to grieve because you lose something and that’s the relationship that you have taken cared of and nurtured for quite some time. Don’t stop yourself from crying because that is what you feel right now. Let it all out; let your tears wash away all your pain.

JUST REMEMBER: Once you feel tired of crying, it only means one thing… that you are ready to stop hurting yourself and you will have the strength to face the world again. You know that you don’t want to cry anymore. You know that it is time for you to finally let it go.

2. Acceptance
Now that you have already let it all out, you are ready for the next step which is acceptance. In this step, you make ways to accept that you are no longer part of each other’s lives. You already need to start living life independently and away from your ex. If you do groceries together or watch movies every weekends, it is high time to accept that you can no longer do that anymore.

Do not focus your mind on thinking about those past memories. Instead, focus on creating new ones. Now that you are single, you have more time with yourself and use this to reflect on what you want to do. Create new hobbies. Make new friends. Spend a lot of  time relating with your family. Re-connect with old pals. Travel and explore. Build and improve your career.

Be more confident and build your self-esteem. Just be happy and make yourself understand that you are done and finish sulking in the corner. You have a new life to live. Along with accepting that you are no longer together, you must also learn to accept a new you that is better and stronger than the old version of you.


3. Move on
After acceptance, it is definitely moving on. You are ready to finally forget all about your past. Forgive your ex if you have to and most importantly, forgive yourself too if there are things that you did which lead to the break-up. What is important right now is that after the painful experience you have learned your lesson. You now know what are those do’s and don’ts in a relationship and you can apply this on your next relationship.

Moving on with a free and light heart will make you happier. Going back to the first step of letting it all out, you can never truly move on if you have not let everything out. Hence, that first step is very vital for you to ensure that this whole “how to deal with a break-up” thing works. No hold backs now. Everything should be put up front because it is where you are heading. Your past relationship will stay at that… past. Focus on your future and you might be surprise that someone else who is definitely better will come along. Just be patient and the right person will be given to you.



ways to survive a breakup
Seriously, a break-up is not a journey that everyone is keen to take but everybody has passed through. Hence, knowing how to deal with break-ups is an important tool in a person’s life because real love hurts. It really does. If you are one of those weak hearted person, you might not be able to piece the broken pieces together which will definitely make you suffer more and you don’t want that. Nobody wants that. Even your ex who left you does not want you to suffer but there really are reasons for everything that we must admit and let go.


Really, I cannot replace a love lost through this article, but what I can tell you is that there is this person out there in the world waiting to meet you. In a subway train, in the streets, at parties, or in bars… maybe inside the church itself, that person is just right there. Wait for that person and while waiting make sure that you take care of yourself so that when you meet “the one”, you can proudly smile and say, “I’ve mended my heart so that it can be whole again to give you the love that you deserve.” To receive another interesting article directly to your inbox click here. 



Happy Relationship Life!

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