A relationship is not at all happy and smooth. Most often
than not, there are relationships that are quite difficult and abusive. You may
be the one experiencing it or your family or friends, but whoever is experiencing
an abusive relationship requires a great amount of support and help to handle it without damages. Hence, i took my time to discuss on how to get over an abusive relationship.
READ Also: 10 Things That Kills A Relationship Slowly
For anyone who have not been in an abusive relationship always ask the person to just leave their partners and start a new life. Yet,
it is easier said than done. Sometimes, the person being abused is not aware
that she is already in an abusive relationship. The first thing to do is to
recognize that an abusive relationship really do exist within.
Signs Of An Abusive Relationship
For you to know if you or a person close to you is in an
abusive relationship, you may answer these following questions:
- Are you afraid of your partner most of the time?
- Are you feeling helpless?
- Do you refrain from talking about a certain topic in fear that your partner might get mad at you?
- Do you ever think if you are the one who has the problem?
- Do you believe that you are being mistreated or punished to justify a mistake that you have made?
- Do you feel embarrass that your family and friends can see that you are being hurt?
- Does your partner embarrass or shout at you?
- Does your partner think of you as a sex object or his own possession and not as a partner?
- Does your partner control where you go and what you do?
- Does he criticize you and make you feel worthless?
- Does he have a bad and impulsive temper?
- Does he constantly checks on you?
- Does he limit your right to use the phone, the car or cash?
- Is he blaming you for his own abusive behavior?
- Is he hurting you? Threatens to hurt you or even kill you?
- Is he ignoring your opinions about things which you should have something to say about?
- Is he threatening to have a custody of your children or perhaps hurt them
- Is he forcing you to have sex?
- Is he saying that he’ll commit suicide if you leave?
- Is he extremely jealous and possessive of you at the same time?
- Is he destroying your personal belongings?
- Is he telling you not to see your family and friends?
If most answers to these questions are a yes, then I am
sorry to say that it is indeed an abusive relationship and it needs to end. Not
later, not in a week or a few months and not for a year… it has to end, NOW!
Why Do Abused People Still Stay In An Abusive Relationship?
Okay, I get it. It’s hard to leave now that you have
pinpoint and confirmed that the relationship is indeed abusive, right? There
are several things that keep a person stick and hold on to an abusive
relationship even if it is really bad for them. We need to understand these
reasons first so that we can encourage ourselves or abused person to just pack
and leave.
1. Emotions.
Emotions play an
important role as to why people in an abusive relationship choose to stay.
There might be love despite the abuse and it is very difficult for them to
leave someone they love quite dearly. Fear of leaving because of threats.
Embarrassment and low self-esteem may also be factors as to why the person
won’t just leave the relationship.
2. Dependent on the abusive partner.
Since the person has limited access to everything, she might
think that she cannot survive the world without his partner. She becomes too
dependent on the person that even if the relationship is quite abusive, she
chooses to stay instead.
3. Pressure.
Admit it or not, people are always pressured. Same like with
the abused person, she feels the pressure of the society and the relationship
on her shoulder. She might not want to admit to the world that she is being
abused because she couldn’t bear to see what their reaction would be.
How To Leave An Abusive Relationship?
So, i am sure you want to know how to get out of an abusive relationship, good! Now that we have confirmed the presence of an abusive relationship as
well as have an overview of the reasons as to why a person could not just leave
it away, it is the right time for the NOW. Leave NOW. Rest assured that no one
will condemn an abused person and the support for the abused is and will always
be there.
First, you need to alert your family, friends or anyone
about the abusive relationship. This will ensure support and help. A person
being abused requires constant support in terms of emotions, financial, social
and even spiritual. The support will make her know that she is not alone in
this battle and that she still has someone to turn to in times of need.
A person who is abuse may also contact an organization that
specializes help for abused women. If an abused person doesn’t have anywhere to
go to, she may contact a battered women’s shelter in her area. Most often,
these shelters also housed children who are being abused by their parents or
anyone.
If the abused needs to sneak away just to leave the partner,
she must plan it ahead of time. Make sure that she has everything she needs
from important documents such as passports to cash and clothes. She must also
have a record and evidence of abuse in case she wants to file a legal battle
against the abusive partner.
Most importantly ensure the safety of the abused. The abuser
might return for revenge, hence, safety is the number one priority. In reality,
there is more to it than simply just leaving. However, leaving is not only a
need but also a must in this case. No one will stop the abuse unless the person
involve ѕtаnd up fоr hеrѕеlf аnd сhооѕе freedom over that failed and bad
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Happy Relationship Life!
Must Read | Next >>> How To Save A Dying Relationship
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