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Now, lets get to the points...
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If your spouse is held-back by reason of a 'mistress-power' and you're still seeing him come home late, he could be having some concern for you or his kids until the phase of not coming home at all but if he's just a regular late-hour-man, think more of other things than a mistress and his friend(s) is/are suspect.
When a married man goes clubbing without his wife, that could be sponsored by his friends. But, it's unfortunate that a woman can't separate her husband or boyfriend from his friends except he, himself, is convinced to do so.
The unfortunate part to this is that if you met him as a bar-lover, the transformation task could be almost impossible but there's hope. If your husband or boyfriend has always been drunk, he stays out late drinking and then comes home to beat you at the slightest provocation, you experienced that and yet you married him hoping he would change?
There are some processes that could manage the situation for you.
READ How to Save a Dying Relationship
Of course, you surely must have registered your detest about his drinking habit and in his practical response, he has chosen to drink out there and later come home, banging on the gates and doors. But, not too worry, tell him he's now permitted to drink Star, Moet or whatever his choice is at home. Be aware that, there's always a mate at the bar that makes the bar feels like home but now, that's gonna be you; more like his bait! Sit beside him, touch him, rub him as he sip and make the home-bar worth anticipating. You could learn to make or buy some refreshments he could take along with the drink.
Here's the transformation part. Be as subtle and humble as you can in-order to make him see reasons to reduce his bottles to almost nothing. I know women got tricks with words and that's the right place to activate it. Make him see the impact of his drinking habit on the kids and if no kids, on his health or even you and his loved ones. Connect the negative impact of his drinking habit to those he loved or got strong emotions for.
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No. 3 - When there's Nothing for the Home-coming.
Oh! He hurt you somewhere along the relationship and you think the fastest way to register your displeasure is to stop being homely; to stop one of those things that kept your relationship strong and going.
Get this young woman, when you show love to even your enemies, you activate their conscience and you make them more worried. Getting even has never been a solution to a dying love-life. Away from that, maybe, just maybe, you felt you're too old to give your man a hug, unbutton and pull off his shirt and all that once-a-little-girl lovey-dovey sweetness?
Truth be that, no matter how old your man is, he's still a baby boy to you as you're his baby girl. Don't be too familiar with your husband to the extent of discontinuing what keeps the romance on-point. And if you're just not feeling him and it looks like the romance in your relationship is dead...
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Whichever happened or is happening, that from office/work to home connection MUST be established. He should have the feeling of being amidst his family: his loved ones.
No. 4 - When Nagging Becomes your Trademark.
You showed him the bills even before he took his night bath, you talk about the kids school fees few minutes after he got in, that's all wrong! I think we still have after-dinner and bed-time-talks, do we? Whatever is the home need, there's always a right time for its listening.
Needless to emphasize on the attitude of "where are you coming from, you can't even make a call to me, no beep on my phone, no text message, nothing, and for your information, the phone bill, the electricity bill, the water bill is beside your meal over there." Whether there's a critical reason why he was late or not, you care-less. A man in his right mind may loose it at such attitude. There's a better way to ask his where-about and notify him about those bills to pay.
READ: How To Get Out and Get Over An Abusive Relationship
Two among these three cases were resolved. It was a double and single-room situation. In my opinion, if what your man could afford at the moment is a single-room don't invite your sibling or relatives to live with you. If you do, the FIRST thing that will be affected among other things is the sex-life of both of you.
Your siblings or relatives can come over for a SHORT visit but if they are to live with you, i'd rather advice you rent another apartment if such isn't under-age.
No. 6 - When He Wants to Pass a Message to You.
One thing is certain, there must be a reason! It could be your attitude to sex, the act of doing your will, the hurt of something he hasn't forgot or forgiven you about and several others. But, whatever it is, if you don't want to keep him out there, ask him to forgive you and that means, you are gonna change in regards.